Once upon a time I could spend a WHOLE day shopping.
Ok let me clarify because I can still spend a whole day shopping but the dynamics of it has done a complete 180.
I USED to cruise into the mall, windows down, listening to my favorite tunes and head straight to star bucks for a relaxing cup of chai or a mocha…..regular milk, extra whip!
I NOW frantically drive around the mall trying to find a close parking space, finger print crusted windows, bumpin the Care Bear count down. I still make a bee line for Starbucks considering I brought the stroller with cup holders…..
“One venti NON FAT, double shot no whip latte please”
Joey :“moo milk, MOOOO”
Cashier : “I’m sorry what does he want”
I’m thinking…..the freaking moo milk, the chocolate milk at his eye level with the cow on the front, come on lady!
I simultaneously hand one to JoJo to drink and one for her to ring up
I pay, put back the moo milk used for ringing up and make my way to the other counter to wait.
Realizing I didn’t get JoJo a pastry, he is pointing to the muffins from his stroller and so I go back in line to purchase whatever it is he wants or suffer the wrath of a muffin-less 1 and a half year old.
And I havn’t even made it all the way inside the mall to do what I came here for. So obviously a coffee is necessary.
Personal Bathroom Time
Once Upon a Time the bathroom was my private spa, my place of peace and mine alone
I USED to spend a hour in the tub, give myself facials, pedi’s, enjoy a shower or spend some time playing with my make-up.
I NOW try to steal a bubble bath but its kinda hard with a JoJo alternating between knocking on the door or sticking his tiny fingers underneath the door and trying to pry it open from the outside and singing “ma ma ma ma ma ma” while I listen to my husband from the other room in front of the t.v. half heartedly say “JoJo leave mommy alone”……as if I can relax over that, LOL.
-Shower are co-showers with JoJo using my bath sponge to clean the walls (fantastic) or else he has his face pressed against the shower door chanting “ma ma ma ma”!
-Make-up…..ha ha ha ha ha. JoJo has used all of my once pristine and expensive make-up brushes as dusters, hair brushes, floor sweepers and whatever else. My eyeshadows are all broken and I try in vain to salvage what I can from them.
Lazy Pool Days
Oh the coveted day off when the sun was shining. Good friends and drinks in the sun!
I USED to shower before I went to the pool, shave my legs, put on my my cutest bikini. I would never think of getting my hair wet, heck I probably didn’t even get in the pool, drink mojito’s and still look pristine when I got home.
I NOW don’t even think of taking a shower before hand, pray my legs are shaven and pick out a bikini JoJo cant easily untie in front of everyone. Not only do I get IN the pool but I’m lucky if I manage to pull my hair up before I hit the water. I make sure we stay hydrated with water and look a wreck on my way home!
Talking On the Phone
Once upon a time I’d spend hours on end gabbing with my girls, laughing and making plans
I USED to share a glass of wine and cig over the phone…..even watch a t.v. show over the phone. Often times it would go dead because we gossiped so much, I’d have to plug it in and call them back ten minutes later.
I NOW am lucky if I even hear my phone let alone find it. If I do get to it before JoJo its my lucky day. The poor caller has approximately 2 minutes to state their business before JoJo feels neglected and tries to climb my leg like a monkey. If they are lucky enough to have called or received a call while he I sleeping they better have good hearing because I am whispering.
-If you’re a parent you know what I am talking about. If your not a parent you might be asking yourself “am I sure I want kids”? Well let me tell you this…..
I havnt laughed so hard as I did while in the dressing room at Macy’s watching my son try to squeeze into a tube top. He thinks everything mommy tries on is amazing and gives me a excuse to spend a hour in the bookstore discovering new books and a even better excuse to stop for ice cream before we leave.
I laughed even harder when I look behind me in the mirror to see JoJo with my bra on or trying to shuffle around my room in my Ugg boots with no pants on or watching him try to rub lotion on. He always thinks mommy smells great and he even lets me pamper him by blow drying his hair and making him look studly.
So I’ve given up my mojito’s…….there is nothing like a sun kissed, pink cheeked baby asleep before you get home to make you feel like a job well done. Nothing like a wet pool kiss and sticky baby arms wrapped around my neck on a hot day. Nothing like the joy of watching your child play under the sun, laughing with no care in the world.
As for the phone……eh I talked on the phone too much anyway. I’d much rather enjoy the day with my baby bear anyways!
I USED to be wild and crazy.....I still am but in different ways. I wouldn't know what to do without him!
My new Pool Partner!