As more and more of my friends are becoming mothers and embarking into this journey filled with diapers, eskimo kisses and scraped knees I find myself comparing each with each other and myself. In my head I ponder their way of doing things, praise their achievements and sorry to say…grimace at some things. Then I remember what it is like to be a new mom ( I still am considering JoJo’s age) and remember that “deer caught in the headlights look“, that odd yet warm sensation of a new baby in my arms, and most of all the fear of screwing up! I also remember all of the unsolicited advice I got from friends and strangers. Despite how hard I try to not be THAT person I find that when I’m faced with a new mom I become THAT person, my own experiences just fall out of my mouth. So if you’re a new mom, smile, nod and store that wild antic that was just shared with you in the back of your head. The crazy dry cleaner or retail clerk may have diarrhea of the mouth but her comment may just save you one day. Who knew that five years down the road her story of how to use peanut butter to get gum out of a child’s hair will save you, LOL!
I guess what I am trying to say is it is natural to offer, seek, and ignore advice from others. I’m not sure what it is in us that makes us do it but I’ve come to accept it as a right of passage into motherhood. I’ve come to realize that every mom needs to succeed and fail on her own and most important, every mom deserves the right to BE a new mom her own way. Isnt that what makes al of our wonderful children unique? Their unique upbringing? Veteran moms also need to conceed that it is possible to learn from the newer moms, it would be silly to deny ourselves any insight that may help our children. So before you think “oh what does she know”? Maybe you should have a listen.
Someday, if not already there is going to be something you envy in her child or in the way she handles a situation and lets pray we are wise and open enough to know how to apply that success to our own family. Just like or friendships, we will never agree on everything and that is ok so take the good, forget the less then desirable and let your relationship with your friends and family be a example for your children.