Ever see a kid offering up “please “ and thank you” more willingly then your child and wonder how he got to be so polite? How about the cool kid who struts onto the playground to have all the other kids gravitate towards him while your shy flower plays in the corner?
We all want our kids to be successful, loved and talented and it really makes me wonder how much is learned behavior and how much is inherent. I don’t have the answer to that but I do have some observations. Ever hear the phrase “kids do as you do, not as you say”, well its true. My niece and nephew are the most social, fun loving, talented and outgoing (not to mention gorgeous) kids I know and you don’t have to look far to see why. Their mother is a social butterfly who always has a friendly smile or helping hand and they have grown up watching her in action. Its no big surprise they are the same way. Now I guess we should also factor in attachment parenting, ie co-sleeping and baby wearing as infants which has been said to help prove confidence. But the point is that kids DO as you do, not as you say. So as your entering a grandma’s house, pushing your child ahead of you, urging her to go give grandma a big hug and kiss don’t be surprised if she runs and hides behind your back. I have never been the adventurous type, I am actually quite the scaredy cat but the last thing I want to do is instill that in my son as my mother did to me. You wont catch me riding a skateboard down a hill or going off the high dive (that’s another thing I can ask his auntie to handle, LOL) but I can try to show a willingness to overcome fears.
So the good thing about children is that they are moldable and we can still change some bad habits if you havnt already. Ask yourself what kind of person you want them to be and YOU be that person. None of us are perfect parents or human beings and I think that is a very important lesson to teach our children also. I sincerely hope that I can show my children how to move on from mistakes in a humble manner and know when is my time to apologize. I think humility is just as important as confidence and its never to early or to late to learn either!
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